


Just for tonight

by sprinklednana



Series: a love like this [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - High School, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angst, Drinking, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Kissing, M/M, Making Out, Slow Dancing, but like only by a few months, charan, chensung are cute, cute jaesung friendship too bc i live for that, ex boyfriends, ex-lovers au, i had to let out all the sadness in some way, i've been reading too many sad aus on twt, jeno is painfully handsome, jeno thinks jaemin is the prettiest, lucas mark and renjun are only mentioned, luren, markhyuck, nomin, other dreamies are there for like a minute, they kiss a lot, this is a little jaemin centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-26
Updated: 2018-06-26
Packaged: 2019-05-28 19:44:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15056411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sprinklednana/pseuds/sprinklednana
Summary: In which Jaemin and Jeno get lost in each other, but the way Jeno looks at him makes him feel like he’s been found.Or alternatively,ex-lovers who are a little too drunk and a little too lonely find each other in a party.





	Just for tonight

**Author's Note:**

> This is my second nomin fic and my fourth and longest fic over-all. Warning: I wrote this in one seating while feeling sad detached lonely in love nostalgic disappointed and a little high so if that's what the fic feels like then I've done my job right.
> 
> I was also listening to Birdy's Wings and Kodaline's Love Like This while writing this fic so my feelings are a cross between the two songs.
> 
> Please do read the tags before reading this! Tell me what you think about it! <3

 

Jaemin’s a little drunk.

 

There is no other explanation for the dull throbbing in his temple, the swaying of his surroundings, and the images of the one person he doesn’t want to think of running across his mind.

  

He wants to blame Donghyuck for encouraging him to come, saying that he’s been drowning himself in books, projects, and basically every single thing a “normal student” shouldn’t be too worried about. He even wants to blame Chenle and Jisung for being all excited and jumpy, and making him not want to say no and disappoint them. But he knows deep down that this is his fault; in the end, nobody forced him and he came to his own accord.

  

He even let Chenle dress him in dark skinny jeans, a white band shirt, and a huge navy blue bomber jacket Jisung lent him. He even let Hyuck brush his light brown hair up, and put make-up on his face.

  

He felt nice and pretty. Jaemin knows that, although he doesn’t mope around and show his feelings much, his friends still worry about him. So he sucks it up, showing the biggest smile he can muster, and let Hyuck spread glitter on his cheekbones. 

 

“This is gonna look so _pretty_ on you, Jaems. Especially when the colored lights hit your cheek! You’re gonna look even prettier than usual.”

 

Jaemin smiles at him then, an honest one. Donghyuck has always been the tough love kind of friend, but he’s been softer and nicer to Jaemin ever since..... well, ever since _that_. It irks Jaemin a little but he’s more grateful of his friend’s consideration than annoyed.

  

There isn’t any thing wrong with the clothes or the glitter or the hair, in fact Jaemin loves it. It’s been a while since he cleaned himself up and let himself feel pretty, beautiful even.

 

The only thing that went wrong was him drinking too many bottles of alcohol to count, and well, the things that came after.

  

And like most things that Jaemin wants to forget but can never really, it begins and ends with Jeno Lee.

  

Jaemin doesn’t know why he’s surprised to see Jeno in the party. 

 

They’re in Wong Yukhei’s house, Renjun’s boyfriend, after all. Strong, sweet, and pretty Renjun who’s in the most popular trio in their school, along with Jeno and Mark Lee.

  

There he stands in the middle of all the chaos called highschool seniors dancing. Looking handsome and steady and so so so so painfully _beautiful_.

 

It’s been months since they both agreed to go their separate ways, but seeing him still leaves Jaemin breathless.  

 

So he decided to help himself and chug the rest of the bitter liquid on his cup before throwing it somewhere, he couldn’t be bothered to look, and making his way to the people dancing.

 

Even in the hazy state of his mind, he knows not to get too close to Jeno and the group he’s with, some random people who are completely enamored by him, just like everyone else. 

  

So he stays a little to the side, hands above his head, eyes closed, and body swaying to the beat of a song he doesn’t even recognize.

 

His mind surprisingly clears easily. The people near him bumps and touches him accidentally, but he just lets them.

  

He loses himself in the music, not even worrying about how he hasn’t seen Chenle and Jisung in two hours. He isn’t too bothered though, his youngest friends would never separate and would always make sure that the other is safe. Maybe he should be a little worried about Donghyuck, since he disappeared with Mark Lee half an hour ago, but he knows from experience, that Mark’s presence may seem intimidating but he’s genuinely kind and sweet. 

  

Jaemin thinks he might’ve lost himself in the music a little too much when he loses his footing and in his “a little drunk” state, he thinks the best way to cope with this is to just close his eyes and try not to cry when his back hits the floor.

  

But he never felt the floor, instead he feels a broad chest on his back, a warm breath on his neck, strong arms wrapped around his middle, and a deep voice calling him a name he hasn’t heard in months. 

 

_ “Nana.” _

 

Jaemin regains his balance and turns to face the source of the voice, although he doesn’t really have to look at the other person’s face to know who it was.

 

He’s heard him singing at the top of his lungs. Speaking excitedly like a child on Christmas day. Whimpering like a baby. Shouting in complete anger. Commanding orders on the basketball court. Whispering sweet nothings in his ear. Talking on the phone for hours.

  

_ He would know that voice anywhere. _

 

“Jen.”

 

And looking at him up close makes Jaemin feel like his heart is gonna burst out of his chest. 

 

Jaemin feels like he sobered up just from the feeling of warmth coming from Jeno’s hands that are still on his waist. 

  

His eyes have always been burdensome to look at, always so intense and so so so beautiful.

 

So Jaemin stares at his mole instead. The one right below the other’s eye, _his favorite_. The one he always runs his fingers gently through whenever they’re lying in bed together and the other is telling him about his day.

  

“You okay?”

 

It takes him a while to answer, and he wants to blame it on the alcohol, but he knows that the real reason he can’t find the right words to say is because of Jeno. He’s always been.

  

“Y-yeah.... I’m sorry.”

 

Jeno gives him a small smile, always so gentle. So different from the way he always is around school.

 

Donghyuck always teased him about being into the strong and silent type, but Jaemin used to just laugh at him. They don’t know about his Jeno, the soft, gentle, playful and cute side that he shows when they’re alone. 

  

But Jaemin kind of agrees with Hyuck though, even in highchool, Jeno has always been a _man_.

 

“No need to be sorry. Are you feeling okay? Do you want to step out or something?” Jeno keeps the small smile on his face, but his brows are a little bit furrowed, a telltale sign that he truly was worried.

  

“No..... I’m okay. I just, I really w-wanna dance. It.... it feels nice.” Jaemin laughs a little and start swaying slowly to the music again.

 

“Yeah, yeah. Okay, do you mind if I?” Jeno trails off.

 

“Dance.... with me?” Jaemin chuckles lightly, and he doesn’t know why he did it. Maybe it’s because of his eyelids getting increasingly heavy. Maybe it was the music playing so loud he can feel the vibrations on his feet. Or maybe, maybe it was his heart, who has been longing to talk to Jeno, _longing to touch him for months._

 

He doesn’t know the exact reason why he did it, but he wasn’t thinking much anyway. He just lets his eyes close and his own arms wrap around Jeno’s neck. 

  

He feels strong hands traveling to the small of his back, and a forehead pressing against his. 

  

And he doesn’t understand, doesn’t get why Jeno’s doing this, why _he_ is doing this.

  

It hurts and it heals. It feels like piecing themselves together but also breaking themselves more apart. 

 

_ It feels like being lost and found at the same time.  _

 

He doesn’t understand, and he doubts Jeno does too.

  

So he just lets it be. He doesn’t worry himself of what might come after this. He doesn’t think of the hurt and the tears and the regret that will come.

  

He lets it go and just feel.

 

Feel Jeno’s warm hands on his lower back. God, how he’s missed this. How many days he took the feeling of Jeno’s touch for granted because he never once thought that a day will come when he won’t hold him anymore.

 

They’re so close he can feel the warmth of Jeno’s breath, smelling like alcohol but he doesn’t mind. He can smell the perfume on Jeno, and how he longed for this. How he missed the days he’d bury his face on the crook of the other’s neck, just breathing him in.

 

He can feel Jeno’s nose brushing against his. And he knows they’re not supposed to be like this. Their movements are too slow and too intimate for the upbeat song booming throughout the whole house. 

 

Jaemin couldn’t hear him but he can see the other mouthing the lyrics to whatever song was playing. 

 

He stares at Jeno’s mouth for what felt like hours. Looks at how naturally pink and beautiful it is. Looks at how Jeno smiles a little while singing softly. Looks at how he licks his lips occasionally. Looks at how he bites his lower lip gently.

 

He can feel Jeno shifting a little before speaking, lips brushing the shell of his ear, “you wanna get out? I brought my car, we could stay there for a while.”

 

 

 

 

 

And that’s how Jaemin finds himself on the passenger seat of Jeno’s pick up, with the other right beside him. They’re both not facing each other, both not ready to look at each other in a brighter light, with no drunk students and loud music to distract them.

  

“You can play some music if you want. The CDs are still in there,” Jeno says, pointing to the compartment.

 

And Jaemin just hums, opening the object the other was pointing to and began rifling through the other’s ever growing collection of CDs.

 

Jaemin pulled one with an unfamiliar cover out, “This one’s new.”

 

“Yeah.” Jeno laughs a little, “Yeah, I got it a little but last month? I think? I was messing around with Mark and Injun one day in a CD store and we ended up buying a couple of old albums.”

 

“Have you listened to it?”

  

Jeno laughs a little, like he’s recalling a memory, “Yeah, they’re not too bad.”

 

Jaemin smiles but places it back and began going through the others again, until he came across a single plain disk with his own handwriting saying _“to my nono”._

  

Jaemin couldn’t help but let out a bitter chuckle, “You kept this?”

 

Jeno looks at him then. And maybe this is the first time they’ve _really_ looked at each other after months. 

  

And it doesn’t hurt like Jaemin expected it to. Instead, it feels like a piece has been put into place. It feels like something he’s been wanting to happen since the last time it did.

  

“‘Course I did, Nana.”

  

So Jaemin put the CD he burned himself in the player, a CD which contains a playlist he made for _his nono_. The songs they like to listen to when they’re lazing around in bed. The songs they blast when they’re slow dancing on the back of Jeno’s pick up. The CD he gave him on their first anniversary, two months before they broke up. 

  

The first song starts playing and Jaemin wants to laugh. It’s Kodaline’s Love Like This. 

 

_ How fitting. _

  

Jaemin finds himself mouthing the first few words of the song.

 

**_ Running through the heat heart beat _ **

**_You shine like silver in the sunlight _ **

 

He can’t believe this is happening. He can’t believe he’s in Jeno’s car again, a car that smells so much like him. A car they have so many memories of. Driving to and from school every day. Driving in the middle of the night, heading nowhere. Holding hands while Jeno’s driving. Jaemin sneaking a kiss to the other’s cheek during red lights. Kissing and cuddling on the backseat for hours on end.

 

**_ You light up my whole heart_**

**_It feels like in the sun, the sun _ **

 

So Jaemin just lets his body do all the work. Let his body do what it wants and just regret it later. He’s been working his body so hard the past few months, it deserves to be set free. Even just for tonight. 

 

 So Jaemin turns the volume up, opens the car door, and slams it after exiting.

 

**_ We're running around and around_**

**_Like nothing else could matter in our life _ **

 

“Nana?” He hears Jeno ask worriedly but he doesn’t answer.

  

Instead he goes to the back of the car and climbs up Jeno’s pick up, laughing when he wobbles a little.

 

 

 

**_But wait, but wait, but wait_**

**_The sun will stop shining soon_**

**_And you'll be gone from my life_ **

 

Jeno is a little bit worried but the alcohol in his system has told him hours ago to just let go. 

 

And let go he did.

 

He gets out of the driver seat and goes to the back of his car.

 

 

 

**_Yeah, you'll be gone, it's as simple as a change of heart_**

**_But I'm not gonna think about the future_ **

 

Jeno sees Jaemin. Hands tracing patterns all around him that Jeno doesn’t understand. Eyes closed. Body swaying to the music blasting from Jeno’s player. Hair all messed up and jacket slightly exposing his right shoulder. The glow from the lamp post and the colored lights that manage to escape the party through the windows hitting the glitters scattered on his cheeks.

 

 

 

**_A love like this won't last forever_**

**_I know that a love like this won't last forever_**

 

Almost 19 years of living and Jeno has never seen anyone or anything as pretty as his Nana.

 

 

 

**_But I, I don't really mind, I don't really mind at all_**

 

Jaemin hears and senses movement but he can’t really bring himself to care. 

 

Until suddenly he feels a lone hand make its way to his side. He opens his eyes and sees none other than Jeno Lee right in front of him, with his messy black hair and intense eyes, as gorgeous as ever. 

 

“Hey.” Jeno says, barely above a whisper.

 

“Hey.” Jaemin replies as he connects his hand on the back of the other’s neck.

 

**_ Slipping into the night love_**

**_ It grows dark but you don't mind _ **

**_Hiding in the back streets, yeah, you'll never notice me _ **

 

Jeno wraps his arms around Jaemin’s waist, gently pulling the other closer to him.

 

Both of them couldn’t wrap their minds around what they were doing right now. Wrapped around each other, chest to chest, and faces mere inches apart. 

  

They began swaying to the song, slow and steady and soft and intimate and so so so so _familiar_.

 

**_ All that I was thinking about was cleaning up my conscience_**

**_ Lost in the memory as it shakes up the corners of my heart _ **

**_Was it my mistake? _ **

 

Jaemin can barely feel the throb on his head and the alcohol in his system, but he feels the rapid beating of his heart and the warmth from all over his body. 

 

_ **Or maybe it was just as simple as a change in your heart** _

**_Just as simple as a change in your heart _ **

 

He feels one of Jeno’s hand start rubbing slow and gentle circles on his back. While his other arm stays wrapped around his waist. Protective. Comforting.

 

**_ I know now a love like this won't last forever _ **

**_ I know that a love like this won't last forever _ **

**_ But I, I know that a love like this won't last forever _ **

**_ I know that a love like this won't last forever _ **

**_But I, and I _ **

  

He feels himself getting tired so he lets his head fall into the other’s shoulder, burying his face on the junction of Jeno’s neck and shoulder. 

  

He feels Jeno tense for a few seconds, before relaxing again. This time his hands roam around till they find their way under the jacket Jaemin is wearing, holding him closer and feeling more of the warmth of the other’s back through his thin shirt.

 

**_ I don't mind at all_**

**_ A love like this won't last forever _ **

**_ A love like this, a love like this _ **

**_A love like this won't last forever _ **

  

Jaemin doesn’t know how long they were swaying to the songs on the back of Jeno’s pick up. It felt like forever to him, but it couldn’t have been more than an hour.

 

He wants to stay like this forever. He wants to live in this moment. He wants for the both of them to stay this time.

 

He’s not sure which of his mind or his heart will burst first.

 

He feels like fate was playing a cruel game with him. Giving him a glimpse of his past; a taste of the future he can no longer claim.

 

Jaemin never wants to be out of Jeno’s embrace. But he knows this is all too good to be true.

 

Jaemin might’ve had a little too much to drink, but he’s spent months replaying the scene of his break-up with Jeno to just completely forget about it. 

 

So he pulls away from Jeno’s shoulder and looks at the other’s eyes.

 

“Jeno.... what are we doing?”

 

And Jeno looks at him with those eyes again and it hurts but he tells himself to keep the tears in, this is not the time and place.

 

“I don’t know.” Jeno’s a lot of things but he’s not a liar. And although Jaemin couldn’t help but chuckle bitterly, he knows not to blame Jeno because honestly, he doesn’t know what they’re doing either.

  

“Why are we doing this, Jen?”

 

“I don’t know, Nana. I really don’t.”

 

In the end, he can’t really blame anyone. They’re just kids. 

 

Confused and awkward kids who have so much love to give but aren’t entirely sure how to love someone properly.

 

Jaemin takes a shaky breath before pressing his forehead against Jeno’s.

  

“I don’t understand.”

 

“We both don’t, Nana. Let’s not... try to understand. _Just for tonight._ ”

 

Jeno brushes his nose against the other’s and Jaemin whispers so low Jeno wouldn’t have heard if he wasn’t so close, “ _Just for tonight_.... Okay.”

 

“Tell me to stop and I will.”

  

Jaemin replies, louder this time, “I won’t.”

  

So Jeno tightens his arms on the other’s waist and presses their lips together.

 

And it’s been so so so so _long_. But it feels so familiar to Jaemin. It feels so right. It feels like coming home after being away for so long. It feels like finally taking a seat after walking for hours. It feels like sleeping at night with his head on Jeno’s chest, legs tangled, and arms wrapped around each other. It feels intimate and comfortable and familiar and intense and _safe_. All at the same time.

 

So he kisses back, not minding that both of their mouths taste like alcohol, but instead getting lost on the softness of Jeno’s lips. He’s missed Jeno kissing him deeply so much it physically _aches_. 

  

He tugs at the hair on the back of Jeno’s neck, making him groan. Jaemin takes this opportunity to explore Jeno’s mouth with his tongue.

 

Jaemin’s making this little noises on the back of his throat and it was driving Jeno _mad_. So he pulls away, smiling a little when Jaemin tries to chase his lips, before diving back in to bite Jaemin’s lower lip. Jaemin’s breath hitch and the other boy hums. 

  

This time, it was Jaemin who pulls away. The other is about to question him, but he pecks him on the lips and trails kisses from the corner of his mouth to his jaw before he nips at the part near his ear. Jeno gasps and he doesn’t have time to recover before Jaemin placed open mouthed kisses from their to the junction where his neck and shoulder meet. 

 

_ Jeno stops breathing. _

 

He feels like he’s gonna lose his mind any minute so pushes Jaemin gently away before giving him a dose of his own medicine.

  

Jeno kisses him on the mouth again, deeper this time, a little more persuasive, before nuzzling his neck and placing open and wet kisses on it. 

  

Jeno takes one of his arms away from Jaemin’s back, just so he could pull down the jacket from the other’s shoulder, so now it was hanging only by his elbows, his collarbones and upper arms exposed. 

  

Jeno pulls away from him completely. He takes a seat on his car, spreading his long legs before him, and unceremoniously pulled Jaemin down right into his lap. 

 

They’ve done this a million times before but it still manages to make heat rise up Jaemin’s cheeks. 

 

Jeno chuckles before tugging down the other’s shirt with his finger, exposing more of his collarbones. 

 

Jeno was about to lean in but stops at the last second and looks him in the eyes, “It’s okay to tell me to stop.”

 

“I know. I won’t.”

 

So Jeno leans in and peppers kisses on Jaemin’s pretty collarbones, giving it small nips here and there.

 

Jaemin doesn’t know how long they spent with him sitting on Jeno’s lap, kissing like there’s no tomorrow. 

 

_And maybe, for them, there really wasn’t._

 

 

 

 

 

Jaemin wakes up with a nasty ache in his head and an even nastier ache in his heart.

  

He remembers spending most of last night with Jeno. He remembers what they did, but not really much of what happened after. 

  

He wakes up in Donghyuck’s room. Light coming from the window they must’ve forgotten to close last night. 

  

He can feel Hyuck on his right, nuzzling his face on Jaemin’s right shoulder like a puppy.

 

He turns to face to his left and sees Jisung on his stomach, an arm around Jaemin’s waist which makes him smile. He also laughs a little when he sees a very much asleep Chenle right on top of Jisung, but Jisung doesn’t seem bothered so Jaemin assumes they’re both comfortable the way they are. 

 

Jaemin takes a deep breath and replays the scene of last night on his mind. He can still feel lips on top of his own and warm hands rubbing circles on his back. 

 

The morning came eventually; _their tonight was over_.

 

 

 

 

 

\----------------  

 

 

 

Much later, when Donghyuck was babbling about his night spent with Mark Lee while searching for clothes to wear for the day in his closet, and Chenle and Jisung were listening to him while play fighting on the floor, Jaemin checks his phone.

 

** 15 missed calls from Jisungie **

** 9 missed calls from Hyuck **

** 6 missed calls from Lele **

** 6 texts from Hyuck **

** 5 texts from Jisungie **

** 5 texts from Lele **

_** 1 text from Nono ** _

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading my fic! 
> 
> Please do tell me what you think about it in the comments! Or if you have any questions you can ask me on my cc curiouscat.me/softjongxn
> 
> You may also talk to me on twitter! my nct acc is @sprinklednana while my exo acc is @softjongxn <3 I really would appreciate it if you talk to me there! <3
> 
> I also have a few other fics, you can check it out if you want. It's much much much fluffier and happier than this. No angst at all <3 (just in case you need sth light lmao sorry)


End file.
